Thursday, January 30, 2014

this sick little one

 i'm pretty sure everyone who comes here already knows that our little baby girl in the hospital.  i hesitate to include this here, but it is a major event in our lives and i want to remember what a little fighter she is.  she's so tiny and i love to baby her (i will freely admit this since she is my very last baby and why not savor every bit of possible baby-ing moments), but you guys, she is such a little toughie.  she is fighting with all eleven pounds of her this rhinovirus (a cold to us, but a mega infection for a 4 month old) and influenza 3, both which developed quickly into pneumonia.  she struggles with each breath to move oxygen through her tiny swollen infected airways.  her lungs crackle like velcro with every breath.  she has had multiple ivs, tubes and wires poked in and around her.  she has high fevers consistently and moans through them.

i miss seeing her big blue eyes.  while she is sick they are only open for 20ish minutes a day, but for those few minutes (documented here) she connects them with mine and tries out a smile.  i tell her what a great job she is doing fighting this and how she's doing her best.  she likes it the most when i say "YES, you are doing a great job, YES, you are so strong, YES, you are so loved..." .

 yesterday luke had to leave the big kids with me and teach at nau.  rose hasn't seen them since she was hospitalized 5 days ago.  she was fevered and moaning when they arrived here, but i turned her around to see them and she immediately stopped crying and smiled.  she hung out on the bed with them like nothing was wrong.  later she was miserable and fevered when the doctor visited, and i again turned her to see her siblings and she immediately quieted and smiled.  (the doctor was surprised).

this morning she had a breathing test and didn't come close to passing, so we aren't going home yet.  but we are praying and loving on her and supporting her while she fights this.  we feel so supported by our friends and family and community.  luke keeps finding food on our porch dropped off by our friends which is the biggest help because he is running around as a single dad and also professor and also delivering things to me and has had no chance to cook.  people have dropped meals off here at the hospital for me which is so amazing since the food here at the hospital is not exactly real food.  our neighbors watched the kids so luke could come visit lonely me, our librarian brought breakfast and lunch to our doorstep.  my parents in texas surprised us by working together with the manager of someburros, who brought over a feast to the hospital room, balloons and stuffed animals for rosie in arms.  i have had so many calls and messages which are super appreciated since it is a little lonely here.  and i love to think of so many people in so many places thinking of her, even just for a second.  thank you.

a few hours after i wrote this, my very own parents walked in the hospital room!  i feel such relief that my kids will have grandparents, luke can work a little, and i can just focus on this baby.  blessings abound.


  1. tears................thank you so much for the update and pics. Love and Hugs to ALL. Linda

  2. You know already how I feel and what I'm thinking. Love...

  3. we love you all and are sending every ounce of healing energy and thoughts to your family and little rosie. love and kisses to all of you.