happy valentines day! we've been busy all week making valentines at home, making valentines at the library, making valentine mailboxes at home to put our secret cards in for each other, and reading every valentine book we could find. now the big kids are napping, rose is batting at the keyboard, and a chocolate cake is cooling in the kitchen. we are celebrating tonight over marcella hazan's spaghetti and meatballs and hopefully things will be calm enough to make a list for each person of some of the things we love about them. i can't remember what we did last valentine's day, but i know right now this simple unfussy day sounds perfect. happy day of love to all of you. xoxo.
Thursday, February 13, 2014
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
she's home! she is healthy! she stayed on oxygen for her first week at home, and now she is breathing well on her own and things are back to normal. the first meal we shared back home began with mateo exclaiming "fee-ooof! we're back together!" and i totally agreed with him. thank you all for your messages and prayers and packages and meals. we are so grateful.
(rose, happy to be home, and the kids working on crafts with supplies left on our doorstep by one of our librarians).
Thursday, January 30, 2014
i'm pretty sure everyone who comes here already knows that our little baby girl in the hospital. i hesitate to include this here, but it is a major event in our lives and i want to remember what a little fighter she is. she's so tiny and i love to baby her (i will freely admit this since she is my very last baby and why not savor every bit of possible baby-ing moments), but you guys, she is such a little toughie. she is fighting with all eleven pounds of her this rhinovirus (a cold to us, but a mega infection for a 4 month old) and influenza 3, both which developed quickly into pneumonia. she struggles with each breath to move oxygen through her tiny swollen infected airways. her lungs crackle like velcro with every breath. she has had multiple ivs, tubes and wires poked in and around her. she has high fevers consistently and moans through them.
i miss seeing her big blue eyes. while she is sick they are only open for 20ish minutes a day, but for those few minutes (documented here) she connects them with mine and tries out a smile. i tell her what a great job she is doing fighting this and how she's doing her best. she likes it the most when i say "YES, you are doing a great job, YES, you are so strong, YES, you are so loved..." .
yesterday luke had to leave the big kids with me and teach at nau. rose hasn't seen them since she was hospitalized 5 days ago. she was fevered and moaning when they arrived here, but i turned her around to see them and she immediately stopped crying and smiled. she hung out on the bed with them like nothing was wrong. later she was miserable and fevered when the doctor visited, and i again turned her to see her siblings and she immediately quieted and smiled. (the doctor was surprised).
this morning she had a breathing test and didn't come close to passing, so we aren't going home yet. but we are praying and loving on her and supporting her while she fights this. we feel so supported by our friends and family and community. luke keeps finding food on our porch dropped off by our friends which is the biggest help because he is running around as a single dad and also professor and also delivering things to me and has had no chance to cook. people have dropped meals off here at the hospital for me which is so amazing since the food here at the hospital is not exactly real food. our neighbors watched the kids so luke could come visit lonely me, our librarian brought breakfast and lunch to our doorstep. my parents in texas surprised us by working together with the manager of someburros, who brought over a feast to the hospital room, balloons and stuffed animals for rosie in arms. i have had so many calls and messages which are super appreciated since it is a little lonely here. and i love to think of so many people in so many places thinking of her, even just for a second. thank you.
a few hours after i wrote this, my very own parents walked in the hospital room! i feel such relief that my kids will have grandparents, luke can work a little, and i can just focus on this baby. blessings abound.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
ruby's obsession with all things cats, meowing at me and everyone she comes in contact with, is slowly being replaced with a new obsession with dancing. last month i brought her to the nutcracker, a tradition i have each year with mateo, and she was completely sold. now she spends much of every day wearing dress up clothes, holding the nutcracker, and spinning (always with her eyes closed, a sweet detail). every day she asks me when she can go to dance class. yesterday she told me that when she gets sad she tries to think of something happy, and that happy thing is "dance class". there is no ballet for 2 year olds in flagstaff (ballet is what she is picturing), but we did find a dance class called "tippy toes" and today was her first day. she had very specific ideas of class - she wanted to bring all of her library books about dance, wear sugar plum fairy wings, her teacher would clap her hands and say "ok everybody!", ruby would have a flower in her hair and on her shirt, and wear a tutu. she had a fabulous time and it was so great to see her dream finally realized. mateo came along too, and i was super proud of him for joining in the class and being brave enough to be the only boy. they both loved it.
Friday, January 17, 2014
we had so many good intentions for a christmas photo this year - lugging our couch to monument valley or sedona or somewhere with a view of the peaks. but then we bought the rv and lugging the couch requires renting a truck so that was out of our budget and it was almost time to leave on our road trip to texas, and i'd just sent out baby announcements, so we decided not to do cards this year. and then a few days later we started dreaming of a card with our rv parked somewhere pretty with its awning extended and lit with christmas lights and a wreath on the front of it. it was a nice idea! luke came home early one day just before our trip so we could make it happen but the kids hadn't napped and i was exhausted and luke had so much work to do and i quietly whispered "should we just make it easy on ourselves and take a couch photo in our yard?". he immediately responded with a yes, and we tried our best to get something with everyone happy. they funny thing about 5 of us is there is never a photo where all 5 of us are looking at the camera and happy. and the light was fading, and our yard was filled with muddy snow and the focus was off, but we did it.
this one above is the one we went with.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
i bought everything i needed to make rosie's birth announcements the first week she was born. but actually making them was kind of impossible. i set so many goals on timing - before she was 6 weeks, before 3 months, by thanksgiving - but still they sat. finally i made it happen with luke's help, only because i couldn't imagine getting into Christmas cards when i'd had these on my mind for months. they went out in mid december. :)
i didn't order her a stamp like i did with mateo and ruby - ruby's stamp was the last one the artist ever made, and she made it for us for free to celebrate her retirement from stamp-making. i wanted to add something to the envelope, so i chopped the bottom off a bunch of celery and the kids helped me stamp a celery rose onto each envelope.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
:: weighs 11 lbs ::
:: is "long and lean" compared to other babies her age ::
:: and has the most perfectly round head, so says her doctor ::
:: smiles with her tongue, like her big sister ruby did ::
:: bats for toys and my face and hair, sometimes with success ::
:: is not a fan of being on her belly anymore ::
:: waits and waits with hopeful eyes at anyone who will give her eye contact, then gives them a sparkly smile ::
:: and sometimes makes loud sounds to get your attention ::
:: cries when our favorite employee at the health store says hi to her (only, only cries to him, but smiles at everyone else) ::
:: laughs ::
:: laughs the most for her brother ::
:: is super ticklish ::
:: is happiest standing (already!) ::
:: and happy to have her hands clapped ::
:: loves to be sung to ::
mateo, who just woke up and asked me what i what i was doing, would like me to add, about rose:
:: she does funny smiles ::
:: she is always so happy ::
:: she is like the funnest baby ::
:: she thinks she's a big potato, but she's a tiny potato ::